Totally Round-Up Week 11

Darren is definitely 'hungry like the wolf' with a greedy 9 points in his jaws this week....an impressive tally that included two Three-Pointers....the Merseyside Derby came up trumps as did his lupine mates in their tussle with Charlton. It seems that every time Ronan tries to cut back the gap between them, Darren has an inbuilt 'reflex' to simply stretch that lead by going on a points rampage.
Penny? 'All she wants is' to keep the lead until the end of the season, whereupon she can claim some dapper T-Shirt to wear on a trip to 'Rio' in honour of her seasons work. The 'wild boys' of Gillingham presented her with 2 of her 5 points this week.
Ronan is trailing miserably at the heel of the hunt.....a truly pathetic single point this week to show for his extra training. He certainly needs someone to 'save a prayer' for him.When asked on Totally Skill TV, about his failure to mount a serious challenge as yet, he seemed perplexed as to how things were going awry. "I've been working so hard on my predictive fitness", he claimed, "but the other two always seem to be able to get great results despite not seeming to train any harder than me...I don't know how they do it....'is there something I should know?"


WEEK 11 TABLE

                                Pts
Penny                       80                
Darren                      73
Ronan                       54

Cheeseorama

Once again, Penny triumphs in a midweek Cup....this time the More Cheese!  More Bread! trophy is hers. This is getting rather embarassing for Ronan, will he ever eat cheese again??? Ever???

News just in: The next midweek Cup competition will be for a Mushroom and Prawn Pastie.

A Short Interlude From Our Natural History Department...

Badgers 1...

Coke-snorting, cousin-fucking, chinless aliens 0

What a Complete Lack of Moral Courage

Words fail me....

Totally Round Up Week 10

Well, after last week's pathetic showing in the Highland Fling by all our Skillers, this week saw them putting in a much more impressive performance. It was Darren who carried the day; obviously more than a little disturbed by news that Ronan was 'breathing down his neck', he put on a spurt and notched up a very dynamic 13 points that showed a wealth of moral courage. Two 3 pointers from the Midlands game in Birmingham and then A!F!C!'s draw with Arsenal, I mean Fleetwood Town, added to his faith in Nairn against Wick saw off his rivals.
Penny was no slouch either and her A!F!C! 3 pointer helped her on to a useful 8 points. Only Ronan faileed to show much moral courage and his work off the ball was lacking to the point where he could only manage a limp 4 points. His overhauling of Darren for second will have to wait a while longer.
Not-that-interestingly, there are now 11 points between each of our competitors. In a parallel universe, that probably has great meaning....but not here thank god.

Week 10 Table

Penny       75 points
Darren      64 points
Ronan      53 points

Totally Highland Round-Up Week 9

 

Ach eye.....twas a bonny week o' fitbaw in the bonny hills an' valleys, but there be nae danger o' the lass Penny losin' her lead as awl wee Skillers notched a toaty three points awl runed.
So it's as ye were, as it were, at the toap after the Ultimate Highland Fling week saw the state o' the patches as pure muck, and meant we couldnae complete awl games. Yon Clachs, Formartine an' wee Keith....haud yer heeds in shame. Thon undersoil heatin' be cheaper than youse think. Forres n' Brora were tae gie it laldy away fae hame. Pure dead brilliant, aye.
We ken noo hae hard thus Totally Skill League is.....an' 'tis only gaunnae git pure solid as we go oan.
Mony a mickle maks a muckle!!
Ah'll leave youse wi' a wee joke:
Ten coos in a fiel'..which wan is closer tae Iraq?............................Coo eight

Scottish Correspondent Hamish 'Ned' McNumpty


WEEK 9 TABLE                          Pts

Penny 'Kilt' McSporran                       67
Darren 'Tatties' 'McHaggis           51
Ronan 'Irn' McBru                        49

Weirdity of the Week

And there was me thinking nothing could surpass the weirdity of Julio Cesar turning out for QPR: how wrong I was proved when Edgar Davids was parachuted in last week to become joint manager at struggling League Two outfit Barnet. Beyond random...

Totally Round-Up Week 8

Ronan is creeping up behind Darren with menace as he bagged two 3-pointers to emerge as Top Skiller this week...Darren managed only 2 points and now can feel breath on his neck as he looks to hold on to second place and mount a serious challenge to leader Penny, whose 5 points kept her sitting pretty at the top, a position she has not relinquished since the second week.
Penny is stationed at her Norfolk training camp this week and will watch from afar as next weekend's Ultimate Highland Fling round unfolds.......safe in the knowledge that her lead looks likely to hold at least until the mince pies are out of the oven. 

WEEK 8 TABLE

Penny        64
Darren       48
Ronan        46

P.S. I've just realised I've been doing rather a lot of breathing down Darren's neck recently.....

Who Moved My Cheese???

I was really looking forward to my lunch today.....but then Balotelli had to go and score a penalty in the last minute to deprive me of the glorious feast that awaited me.
Congratulations to Penny, who adds another midweek cup to her ever burgeoning haul. But whereas you can shrug your shoulders and move on when a banana or pineapple is missed by a whisker; or you may curse your luck and resolve to train even harder when a Walnut Whip slips out of view, when the prize is the cheese of your choice and a fresh crusty roll.......well, let's just say it will take a while to get over this one.

Totally Round-Up Week 7

All skillers notched a three pointer each this week (with Ronan greedily adding an extra one), and while Toulouse obliged Penny and Ronan with a 2-0 away win, it was Bayern Munich who helped Darren along to a total of 5 points this week. But Ronan is now breathing firmly down his neck as he gobbled up 10 points to close the gap. Penny held her own with a vital 8 points and it's all getting a tad squeezy down Totally Skill way.
Did I hear somebody mention cheese and a crusty roll???

Week 7 Table

Penny     59
Darren    46
Ronan     40